How do I teach the boys healthy communication? They obviously know how to communicate - as they go from one level to the next level in their development. What's the best way for them to communicate what they want and/or need? Is it through a screaming tone or a calm one? Is it through a tug on my clothes or a certain look? Is it through a word or a pointed finger? Is it through shoving or slapping? Is it through crying and whinnying?
Surprisingly to me, they are learning much of their communication through how I communicate to them. It truly is that simple. It is also that alarming - at times when it is a way that is not healthy.When I communicate in a calm fashion, they learn to communicate in a calm fashion. Even when emotions are at their worst - even then - if I stay calm in communicating they will do the same. How do I know that? WELL, because of doing it wrong (laughing)! Hallelujah for God's mercy and grace when I mess up. I have lost count of the times I have had to ask the boys for forgiveness. Hallelujah that in those moments they are learning what it is to communicate humility (asking for forgiveness when I mess up) AND learning what it is to communicate pride (running with crazy emotions and getting angry and mad).
Bottom line: As I learn to communicate in healthy ways - NO MATTER HOW I FEEL - the boys will learn the same healthy ways to communicate.
HOW does it all come together? By God's grace and mercy. I find that in starting the day off with prayer, WITH the boys, and asking for grace to love well, our days turn out much better.
Finish it well with thanksgiving to the LORD. He is always worthy of our praise.
No comments:
Post a Comment